Post by lajohnnystylez on May 30, 2020 7:24:30 GMT -5
Special FBI Investigator John Rancour...What a PHuCKiN “MO-MO” am I right? Do gooder, boy scout, receding hairline, coffee stained, same suit and tie wearing SHITBAG that takes his job way too seriously. He may not look like it, but our man here has quite the aspirations for his future. There is nothing wrong with being ambitious, nothing at all...Well maybe until you step even a single toe over the thin line between ambitious and
!!!!DeLuSioNaL!!!!!
WHICH THIS F’N DUDE HASN’T SEEN THAT LINE SINCE THE LAST TIME HE SAW HIS OWN DICK!!!
Which according to my rough calculations had to be at least three hundred and forty five apple fritters ago! Because it’s like I keep tellin this phucking numb skull, if he thinks he is going to make section chief one day by finally closing the case on me and putting me away for good then he obviously isn’t nearly as good at
!!!!F’N THiNKiNG AS HE PRETENDS TO BE!!!!!
Cause If HE COULDA….HE WOULDA YA DIGG?
I phucking hayte cops...Yeah, yeah I know he’s a phucking FBI agent...But at the end of the day as far as I’m concerned the only difference is who they report to and where their jurisDICKtion lies. To be honest though I gotta hand it to the fat phucker...He has gotten pretty close a time or two. But almost only counts in horseshoes and hand grades and since this aint either one of those
!!!!!!!!ALMOST DON’T F”N COUNT!!!!!!!!!
...AND LAST I CHECKED THEY DON’T PROMOTE PEOPLE WHO ALMOST GET THE JOB DONE!!!
So I know what some of you are thinking...If this dude is such a pain in your ass why not just phuckin kill the prick and be done with it? Well aside from the fact that if this walking grease stain went missing I would be prime suspect one, two, and three...But there is also the fact that I live for simple joys in life like precious little moments exactly like the one that is fixing to take place once Special Investigator John Rancour finishes interrogating Gabriel Tuck in this shitty Perdido Key Florida sheriff’s station that had the interrogation room with the glass you are unable to see through. If John or Tuck for that matter could see on the other side of this glass both of them would almost assuredly have a got damn
!!!!!CoNiPTiON!!!!!
JUST LIKE DAMON RIGGS WILL AFTER Le AND I WALK OUT WITH OUR TAG TITLEZ ON SHOWCA$E!!!
But we will get to that in just a wee bit...There were some matters that needed wrapping up here first. So I turned to the actual section chief of Mr. Rancour’s division Special Agent Roland Blackwell who replaced the recently transferred section chief Blake Lopresto who wound up having to take the fall for the last time Ole John, John fumbled the case. And I’m not physic or anything but I was beginning to get the impression Mr. Blackwell and I shared a similar opinion of Special Investigator John Rancour. Unlike his predecessor Section Chief Blackwell seemed like someone I could work with. Someone who appreciated the complicated world of cops and robbers, and understands that it’s not as morally black and white as your favorite NCIS or SVU would have you believe! Because at the end of the day these pencil pushing peckerheads only want their quotas met and results. They want to solve cases, and as all branches of the United States government and lawe enforcement agencies have proven time and time again they could literally give a phuck how they get solved as long as the case gets closed and the charges stick!
My confident and victorious train of thought was then suddenly and very rudely interrupted as I heard Gabriel Tuck shout my name once more as he had been doing for the last hour and a half. My eyes lit up as I shot a mischievous smirk Roland Blackwell’s way indicating that I knew things were about to get interesting. I know John and I know Gabriel and both of their patience was worn about as thin as it could possibly get about twenty five minutes ago...One of them was one incorrectly worded sentence away from losing their temper and then as they say in my line of work...BUSINESS
!!!!!IS ABOUT TO PICK UP!!!!!
Gabriel Tuck: FUCK YOU I WANT MY PHONE CALL!
John Rancour: Mr. Tuck you were given your phone call, perhaps you should have called someone else that isn’t a grown man that dresses like a CLOWN and bindly takes orders for a living.
Gabriel Tuck: How in the fuck do you know who I called?
John Rancour: Well aside from the fact that my badge says FBI on it...You are at a temporary holding station all outgoing phone calls are recorded and monitored…
Gabriel Tuck:FUCK YOU PIG I AINT TELLIN YOU SHIT!!!
John Rancour: I thought you might say that...And that’s fine you really don’t have to say much, because tomorrow morning you will be extradited first to Texas where you will faces charges of vandalism, arson, and attempted second degree murder...Of which there are more than a handful of witnesses willing to testify as well as actual video evidence placing you on the scene. Ohh and that’s not to mention the bullets we dug out of that poor house maid match that pistol of yours we confiscated earlier this evening. And the fun doesn’t stop there CLOWNBOY...
Because after your arraignment in Texas then you wll be extradited to Louisinan where you will again faces charges of arson, armed robbery, assault and battery, kidnapping, transport and distribution of illegal firearms over statelines and then the big one...multiple first degree murder! Which judging by that smirk on your stupd face I assume you aren’t worried because Johnny told you he would take care of this for you if this situation ever came about. But in my experience dealing with that blue haired foul mouthed degenerate if he had any plans on sticking his neck out for you...Don’t you think he would have answered at least one of your calls by now?
Or at the very least sent one of his high dollar lawyers he has on retainer to get you out? I mean what the hell is taking him so long Gabe? I mean sure he’s a busy man and all that happy horse shit, but this is a matter of great importance don’t you agree? I mean these are some serious ass charges my friend. If that woman in Webberville would have died you might be facing the death penalty! And since Johnny’s lawyers aren’t here I am assuming you don’t have one of your own. SO unless you have unwavering faith in the public defender or are planning on representing yourself odds are you are going to need a friend...And I’m not talking about those mentally challenged saps that look like reject henchmen from when Tim Burton was directing Batman whom we haven’t been able to locate by the way...If you catch my drift there wiseass!
Gabriel Tuck: FUCKIN COCKSUCKER!!
John Rancour: I’m sorry I didn’t catch that?
Gabriel Tuck: What do you need from me?
John Rancour: Well if I am being honest looking over the details of these charges there isn’t anything that links any of it back to Johnny. If you could provide me with something anything…
I didn’t like where this was going so I shot Special Agent Blackwell a look that let him know this was his que. Blackwell’s face turned almost Kool-Aid red as he seemingly stood by and watched his subordinate almost completely phuck these cases up, so before John could finish the sentence Roland pressed the intercom button interrupting him.
Section Chief Roland Blackwell: JOHN! THAT’S ENOUGH GET YOUR STUPID ASS IN HERE..NOW…
John Rancour: But...He is finally willing to help me link all this shit to Joh…
Roland Blackwell: I SAID NOW!!!
John Rancour: Pardon me for just a moment...Don’t go anywhere!
Gabriel Tuck: Real funny asshole!
Scene then switches back inside the room behind the glass where the Section Chief and I sat and waited for John Rancour to waddle his fat ass into the room to see why he was ordered to stop when he was getting the info he needed. SO while we waited I turned to Roland and made one final request…
LA Johnny Stylez: Mr. Section Chief it has been my pleasure assisting your department where I could in these matters but as I’m sure you know I have a multi million dollar company to run and I have some places I need to be. I have full confidence you and your men can handle it fro here, but might I have a word with Gabriel before I head out? When I tell a man he is fired I feel as if I should do it to their faces and well I’d also like to make sure he knows it is in his best interest to cooperate with you and yours as best as he can to make things go smoothly as he has done more than enough damage already.
Roland Blackwell: Well thank you Mr. Stylez...And let me just say my wife and kids love OPW. We wound up getting a prescription to HBO because of it. You may of course speak with your man before you head out…
John Rancour: WHAT IN THE FUCKIN FUCK IS HE DOIN IN HERE?
Roland Blackwell: IF YOU MUST KNOW JOHN...HE IS BASICALLY DOING YOUR JOB! Once it was reported that the animal on the otherside of this glass was the one responsible for almost murdering that poor woman in Webberville Texas, the management at Outlaw Pro Wrestling were more than cooperative in assisting us in linking Mr. Tuck to not only that but as well as a few other cases that he was suspected of. Cases that have been open for almost five months. Federal cases that had no leads, no witnesses, NOT SHIT! But now thanx to Roger Wright, Mr. Stylez and the rest of the OPW staff we have not only one but two men in custody wanted for several federal charges that will now be put to rest for good!
John Rancour: But sir...You can’t! Odds are this fuckin junkie shitbag is himself responsible for most of if not all of these crimes! I...I have proof linking him to the gun running incident outside of Baton Rouge a few months ago..
Roland Blackwell: ENOUGH! Ohh you have proof do you? Just like you had proof that Johnny Stylez was responsible for Blair Buchannan’s mother’s death that was ruled a suicide after further investigating...Which of course was followed by Johnny’s lawsuit against the FBI...and that book of his which made you and your former boss look like a bunch of amature IDIOTS with your thumbs up your asses! Now we have enough evidence to where we can close these cases right now. There is no need to look ay further into the matters because there is more than enough evidence to support that Gabriel Tuck was acting on his own as was Mr. Knowles when he decided to commit eighteen counts of fraud, forgery, and theft. Which is something we desperately need after you and Lopresto made us look like the incompotent bafoons the two of you are!
John Rancour: But Roland…
Roland Blackwell: MR. BLACKWELL….
John Rancour: ...Mr. Blackwell you can’t just let this sleezy piece of shit walk out here! I’m telling you he is the one we are after. He and his buddy..uh, uh...what’s his name...uhh Xavier….WOLF! Yeah Xavier Wolf that’s his fuckin name!
Roland Blackwell: DId you just say Xavier Wolf?
John Rancour: Yeah I sure did, why?
Roland Blackwell: John, just how fuckin stupid are you? DO you have any idea what would happen if you brought him or any member of his family in without undeniable evidence to support whatever charge you want to bring against them? Have you no clue who his big brother is? Jesus man I thought you were a detective?
LA Johnny Stylez: Yeah so listen you two sound like you got some shit yall need to work out...SO I’m just gunna...Yeah excuse me….Hey John...lookin good there bubba...Did you gain weight?
Before he goes Rancour grabs Johnny by the arm and pulls him in close and says,.
John Rancour: This aint even close to being over asshole! I won’t stop until I slap the handcuffs on you myself!
Roland Blackwell: JOHN! LET HIM GO THIS INSTANT OR I SWEAR TO GOD YOUR NEXT ASSIGNMENT WILL HAVE TRAFFIC BEAT COPS MAKING FUN OF YOU….IS THAT CLEAR!
John Rancour: Yes sir Section Chief Sir…
Roland Blackwell: And apologise to Mr. Stylez as well…
John gives Johnny a hard look who stopped dead in his tracks and turned his head to the side so he would be sure to hear it. John is biting down on his own teeth so hard any harder andhe might crack one of them. After Section Chief Blackwell insists he apologise again John Rancour gives the most humiliating apology of his entire life.
John Rancour: Mr. Stylez I just want you to know that I’m
!!!!!!WHAM!!!!!!
YUP I DEFINITELY JUST SLAMMED THE DOOR IN HIS F’N FACE!!!
I knew what the next word out of his mouth was gunna be, so I didn’t really need to hear it...Plus I actually was in a hurry but first I had to cross one last T and dot one last i...SI I walked to the room next door and I opened it. Tuck’s face almost lit up when he saw me walk through it. He stood up and immediately started asking me all these questions. I then put my index finger over my lips trying to tell him to shut the phuck up and motioned to the glass to my right. He then took my point and sat down as I took a seat as well.
LA Johnny Stylez: Gabe...what in the phuck were you thinkin? When I let you into the Syndicate, I phuckin told you you didn’t have to handle any of this petty shit anymore...But at the end of the day that’s all you are isn’t it? A petty crook pulling petty jobs just scraping by!
!!!!!F’N PATHETIC!!!!!!!
...AND NOW YOU ARE GOING TO PAY THE PRICE OF STUPIDITY IN THIS BUSINESS!!!
But at the end of the day I guess you are the company you keep. ANd see that is what I keep circling back to amigo...I should have maybe seen this comin...I should have maybe taken into account that you weren’t really Syndicate material because in your spare time you run around with a bunch of mentally handicapped morons who may just as well called the cops and told them they were criminals fixing to commit a crime! And that’s the point Gabriel. You may not dress like they do, but rest assured you are most definitely a bigger
!!!!F’N CLOWN THEN THEY WILL EVER BE!!!!!
….WHICH IS WHY I CAME HERE TO TELL YOU….
!!!!!!YOU’RE F’N FIRED!!!!!!
...Ohh AND TO GIVE YOU THESE…
Then reach in my back pocket and pull out a ziplock bag and slam it on the table in front of him along with three wires one red one one green one and one yellow one. Inside the ziplock back are brownish red white teeth that had been filed into fangs and pulled from someone’s mouth. If you’ve been following along and judging by the look on Tuck’s face he knows exactly whose phuckin teeth these were.
Gabriel Tuck: WHat the fuck did you do?...And what the fuck are these wires?
LA Johnny Stylez: Well the wires go to the equipment in there to ensure that none of our conversation would be recorded. You see if you are going to commit a crime rule numero uno and dos...IS COVER YOUR ASS YA MONGOLOID!!!! You see if you and your merry band of idiots want to commit every petty crime in the book and see how many life sentences you get when they finally catch up to it...Then fine go ahead, but when you assholes are linked to me I simply can’t have that! Now I don’t know how much the tooth fairy will give you for those but I’m sure it won’t be enough to pay even the shittiest lawyer out there. So here is what you are going to do. You are going to take the blame for all of this...
Every phucking shred of it...And you are going to take your lick like a man..And you are going to do it because you don’t want the death penalty. You are going to do it, because you don’t want what happened to your little Mentally challenged Henchmen to happen to you...Which it will the moment they transfer you to gen pop! Because I can get to you in there way more easily than I can out here! That and well that little secretary of mine you were banging that you used to blackmail me into giving you Chamber’s location that time is already on Section Chief Roland Blackwell’s speed dial...and she is willing to testify and tell a jury of your peers that she saw you commit murder and with the way she was told to describe it, there aint a jury in the United States that wouldn’t come back and demand that you get the LETHAL INJECTION and not even get the courtesy of the pointless alcohol swab before they do it!
I am sorry things had to turn out this way. Because I just want you to know Gabe I did see potential in you once upon a time. But this should just go to show you what happens when you just do shit without thinking about it...That and well you can think what you want about me...But I am fixing to leave here and go introduce your replacements to my army of pornstars...ANd you are fixing to become the newest one on
!!!!!CELL BLOCK E!!!!!
….PSSSTTTTT DON’T DROP THE SOAP DiP SHiT!!!!
But ultimately you did this to yourself...And I always knew you would...And I knew that because I have always been at least three steps ahead of you! SO this is the part where I tell your Sorry ASS to be smart and do the smart thing...And take the blame for the shit you did. And when you get to prison be sure to give my regards to Chamber will ya? It is my understanding he is going to be your cell mate which means the two of you will have about twenty five to LiFe to compare notes on how LA Johnny Stylez made the two of you
!!!!!!SoaK!!!!!!!
!!!!!!SoMe!!!!!
!!!!!!!!UP!!!!!!!
...SEE YA NEVER ASSHAT!!!
Then suddenly as Johnny stands up and winks at Gabriel who lunges toward Johnny but can’t reach him because he is cuffed to the table. Two guards then immediately burst into the room with nightsticks and then procced to give Gabriel Tuck what we on the street refer to as a SeDaTiVe BeaTInG...Johnny steps foot out the door and the scene then suddenly fades away like a dream sequence used to on Saved by The Bell or any of those coming of age sitcoms frm back in the gap to inside an SUV being driven by Xavier Wolf. His wife and Johnny’s OPW Immortal World Tag Team Championship partner Le’Andra Fury is in the front seat. Sitting right next to Johnny is Le’Andras assistant Chan whom Johnny affectionately refers to as Tink. Tink is passed the fuck out as Xavier and Le sat and listened to Johnny’s tale until he finished and then sat back rolled his window down and lit up a cigarette. There is a strong brief silence in the car as anyone who has ever had a conversation with me knows there was a lot of information and words just thrown around and sometimes it can take more than a moment to process it all.
Xavier Wolf: SO we won’t be hearing from our buddy Mr. Special Investigator John Rancour for a while?
LA Johnny Stylez: I want to say no...But that would imply him being smart, and well he has it in for me so bad I don’t think he can help himself But he was given strict orders to keep his distance for now. SO I would imagine as long as we don’t give him reason to come sniffing around our butt cracks he won’t!
Le’Andra Fury: Nice visual Johnny!
LA Johnny Stylez: Thank you my dear I thought so too!
Le’Andra Fury: Right...so remind me again why we have to drive all the way out to the desert to do this shit?
LA Johnny Stylez: Because uhhhh….I saw it on the DOORS movie and it just made sense I guess? Look point is Knowles and Tuck made some huge ass dumb phucking mistakes that could have toppled everything I...We have built down on our heads! People are always running their mouths about the factions I run. I have been apart of some of the most notorious groups this business has ever known, but seemingly everytime I try and create one of my own….THere is always some kinda bullshit like this. I know I don’t exactly try and recruit the most upstanding citizens...But I have to believe there is truly HONOR AMONGST US THIEVES! And the fact is going forward...The Syndicate will not join my list of failed factions.
The Syndicate will etch it’s name in the annals of history as one of the most dominating, ruthless, and unforgettable factions in the history of Outlaw Pro Wrestling..and PRO WRESTLING IN GENERAL! Because my friends as I have touched on recently after HighWAY begins phase two of our plan. If the OPW locker room thought we were unbearable before...They won’t have a phuckin cliue what awaits them on the other side of HIGHWAY2HELL! But before we can get there it became clear to me that I should at least make some effort to build trust between myself and my faction.
And while Blair and Aleister won’t be joining us...I figured the two of you would be a good place to start...Especially considering the slightly fractured state X’s and My state of trust is currently in! But ths is our future I’m talking about guys. This is our legacy….Plus as far as I am concerned DRUGS are the answer to phucking everything! ANd I don’t know about you guys but if I don’t drop a few hits of acid every couple of months I start to loose my mind.
Xavier WOlf: Yeah well I don’t know about that last thing you said, but I agree with us working on our trust. Because we are all in on this Syndicate thing with you Johnny..But trust is absolutely PARAMOUNT! Betray it again and know I probably will be the one who at the very least attempts to kill you!
LA Johnny Stylez: ROGER THAT! Ohh and X if you could please not say things like that once these drugs kick in I would mucho appreciate it! But anywhoo...What do you say we get this party PHUCKIN STARTED!!!
Xavier Wolf” I suppose now is a good a time as any...Beause I think we are here!
LA Johnny Stylez: OHHHHH LE can I wank up TINK?
Le’Andra Fury: JOHNNY BE NICE!!!
LA Johnny Stylez: Meh, you know I can’t promise that! Ohh I can’t wait to see this little phucker tripping balls...It’s gunna be an interesting evening my friends to say the least!
Le’Andra Fury: Yup that is exactly what I’m afraid of!
Xavier Wolf: FAMOUS LAST WORDS!
And with that Xavier pulls the SUV into park and turns off the ignition. The two front doors open as Le and X step out and stretch their legs a bit. Johnny then looks over at Chan and starts mentally scanning the best way to rouse him from his nap...And he settles on…
...Wanna see that? Make sure you tune into pt 2….Till then as always
...It’z BeeN YoUR PLea$uRE!!!!
4:19
GoT
-A-
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